Kids are leaving me.....:'-(

I kinda look forward to the break, but I always cry when the kids leave me. I just can't help it. I will enjoy the rest and touch of freedom I'll get ;-). I plan today to try to get the old room cleaned out enough that we can move in there. More then likely I'll do that for a while then enjoy my time alone. Just relax. Watch tv, read a book...things I barely get to do when they are here.

I really don't have a lot to say this morning. My diet and exercise is going great. I did eat a nutty bar this morning, but Dylan ate half so it's ok. It's alright to have things, just don't go crazy. I am not going to buy anymore Almond Roca and when I get my $ Friday I am going to have a list. It's not go just to do a shopping free for all. Most of all no one's getting anything on mine but myself. I gave in last month and look where it got me. I ran short. This next month I am going to buy nothing but healthy food, but I'm gonna make that stuff taste amazing! I feel so proud of myself for getting out there and walking, and you would not believe how great I feel when I get back home. Almost high. It's that feeling I look for in other stuff. I can see why people get addicted to exercise. You do feel alive when you are done.

It's strange this morning not to be rushing my little one away to school, and we are all kinda chill. Gia is still asleep...amen...lol. When she gets up she's little boss lady and 12 hours of demands kinda where me down. I will be so sad when they leave, I might need a nap...lol. Might be a good idea so I can enjoy my night. Well that's enough for today. More Later. ;-)

Breezy Afternoon

Had two of my sister's kids most of the day. I was shocked that William had something to do with me. Diet went great. I think the key to my weight loss is going to be sugar intake. I noticed that I cut it out almost completely today and I felt so much better. I also only had food when I felt that I needed, not to feed my feelings. That's another key. I have to learn to deal with my emotions without food, and do not over due things that I like.

My kids had a blast outside again today. Makes sense just to let them play and explore. Dylan and I played pretend that he was Ben 10 and soon Gia was joining in. I had a lot of fun, just letting go and being free.

Another addiction is the net...lol. May sounds silly but I text my facebook and think I have to check all my sites like every four hours...lol. But I don't. My inbox and stuff on there is gonna be on there when I find the time. No big hurry.

Ok, so what's next. Moving into the large room this week while the kids are goine. Man it's gonna be so much better having more room, but they'll still be in and out of the room and that will drive me crazy. Either way we'll all have our own bed, and it will be cooler in there this summer. Hopefully, by the end of summer I will be working somewhere. I will then save for my divorce and then save for a vacation just for the kids and I. No one else.

Another thing I am hoping to do will be in October. Gonna save to attend the Voodoo Festival/Halloween there, but maybe not. Who know by then. Life is all about choices, freedom, and happiness, and I plan to have it all...:-)

Breezy Sunday

It's been a beautiful day here in Mississippi. I took this picture of my mother's small flower bush. I took several and I think this one was the best. It felt so good to be able to take some pictures in the cool breeze. It inspires me to do some planting. I want to plant some guords (however you spell it) and maybe paint them and turn them into some birdhouses.

This kids enjoyed the sunshine as well. Pushing each other in Dylan's old pickup truck. I really need to get them one each to ride. I hope I can do that soon. It was so great to see them having fun. I only wish it wasn't so cool. Also, if they would of minded me a little better that would of been great. :-)

So this week I am changing rooms in the house that seems to be a yearly thing as the weather changes. I simply hate being so damn cluttered in this small room. It would be really great just to get a place of my own. I have never just lived alone. It was always with a partner. I guess it won't be so bad since I have the kids, but I hate being alone. I am just one of those people. I am very paranoid of the outside world. Not in a crazy way, but the world itself is crazy. You just have to be on your toes a little more.

Today when I got home my nerves we're really bad. I think it was just coming home from a peaceful and uncluttered place to where it's utter chaos. I simply hate the way things are now, but I have to just pull my boot straps up and get with it. Location is my main probably, but I'm not sure I would make it alone in a larger city. That would be the beginning to some things and the end of others, but as the way things are now....something's got to give.

The nerve of some people.....lord come get me! Martha found the keys to the cage!